The Avengers
USA 1998. Director: Jeriemiah Chechik
Cast: Sean Connery, Ralph Fiennes, Uma Thurman, Jim Broadbent
Dead already on arrival. Then the critics danced over its corpse singing hallelujah. Obviously it's awful, but it isn't without entertainment value. Although that depends on how broad your definition of "entertainment" is. I would be a fool not to admit that there were certain bits that I found extremely fascinating, but in essence it's really only Uma Thurman's imaginative choice of clothes that keep you awake. That and the question you repetedly ask yourself, what in hell did Sean Connery thought he was doing? Though he gets to wear a teddy-bear suit and get intimate with Thurman, which, they say, was one of his conditions for accepting the part. Scottish rat.

Secret aristocrat agent John Steed (Ralph Fiennes from Schindler's List) and partner Emma Peel (Thurman) investigates weather psycho Sir August De Wynter (Connery) and then the plot gets pretty foggy, pardon the expression, as Wynter plans to control the weather and take over the world as we know it. That's the supposed plot I think.

The weirdest thing about this movie adaption of the cult TV-series is how it is made. Director Jeriemiah Chechik has if possible succeeding in making a film that's even worse than his disastrous 1996 Diabolique remake (the one with Sharon Stone). It's as if the guy thought he was payed millions and millions of dollars to make a low-budget avant-garde film and no one reminded him otherwise. For instance, we have to wait some 45 minutes for any conflict to be presented, something which should have been established in the film's first ten or so minutes. And then there's the jagged and all but fluid narrative and the hopeless editing. Everything is so damn obscure. Admittedly perhaps because one isn't used to it in such a mainstream film as this, I don't know. Chechik's total lack of respect (Godard style) for the Hollywood model of filmmaking is maybe admirable but mostly moronic in these circumstances, as it's bound to come across as just plain bad. It doesn't really matter that the special effects are impressive, especially the giant steel-insects. It doesn't matter that the set design and clothes are brilliant and it doesn't matter much that fast-talking British stand-up comedian Eddie Izzard makes an unexpected (for him) silent part as a supercool baddie. If you can't follow any clear story line, you'll only get annoyed and ultimately lose patience. Fans of movies so bad they're almost fun are definitely in for a gem, though. Nevertheless, you won't see any further films by Jeriemiah Chechik at your local cinema for a long time.

© The Inzomniac's Movie Madness Review.